One thing I didn’t mention in this video when talking about the essential nature, power and opportunity that is available to the collective should we all, especially white European descent folks, get really curious about the real history of our people and what it means in the context of today, IS - native born Europeans ALSO would deeply benefit from this work.
This became especially apparent to me after my first trip to Scotland this past Nov/Dec 2024. Nearly every Scottish person I encountered I was extremely curious about their thoughts and feelings on Scottish Independence.
Did you know that Scotland - its citizens, its people, its elected officials cannot just collectively vote for independence? A referendum (like the one in 2014) can only be brought about by the elected government officials in parliament if they feel so inclined to. which they don’t because that would be dismantling the empire.
The way my lover words it is “that would be like the victim asking the abuser ‘can I please leave?’ Why in the world would the abuser say yes? Why would they allow that?”
Isn’t it so devastatingly interesting how the behaviors, patterns, tactics, etc. in a narcissistic relationship show up in governments? Especially ones hell bent on being an empire? A type of “rule” that requires mass oppression and abusing a population into not fighting back and normalizing the status quo?
Unless we as a human, as a people, as the person reading my words written here in this digital page rise up to our collective abuser - The U.S. Capitalist Political Government Machine, and leave we will never ever be free. Literally, symbolically and definitely not psychologically. When the 2016 election happened and Trump was first elected I will never forget how obvious it was to me a significant cause of this outcome being deeply tied with this thing of intergenerational trauma and mental health. I remember a family elder completely dismissing my analysis of the symptoms and its cause.
I stand by my diagnosis.
We are not well and that is largely to do with the fact that we are in and have always been in a narcissistic relationship and those my friends, will slowly kill you. Day by day. Bit by bit. Cut by cut. It will wear you down. It will scramble your mind and your reality. It will make you think you are to blame. That you cannot leave. That this is the best it can get. That you need them and only them. That you must just make it work.
We must free ourselves from this trauma bond. We must do this internal work so it ripples out into all of our relationships, and all our collective spaces, until we as a people are strong enough internally to finally leave together, forever.
The only effective way to get out a narcissistic relationship - an abusive situation, is to go no contact. Sorry if that sounds extreme, but so is the abuse. So is the control. So is the stress pumping through your veins every single day impacting your long term health outcomes, as evidenced by the Adverse Childhood Experiences Survey which demonstrate a CAUSAL (not correlative!), yes that’s right, a causal relationship to “negative health outcomes” such as, but not nearly limited to cancer, suicide, heart disease, crones disease, and many more.
So what does going no contact look like in the context of this out-of-control-killing-us-all-slowly-yet-rapidly-Empire?
Great question. Here are just a few of my ideas. Please please let me know yours. This is how we build together. This is how it starts. We will get the hang of this new thing we’re trying to do. I see so many people trying more earnestly to lean into this work in their unique life as we face these horrors today.
Ways to go No Contact with a Narcissistic Empire:
DM your followers on instagram. Yes one by one as much as possible. Share with them you are leaving instagram and thought of them and would like to stay connected. provide them one way at least to stay connected. ask them where else they would like to connect? ya know, what’s their substack, what’s their email, what’s their bluesky, mailing address, youtube handle, whatever! Phone number! the specifics are up to you. But the point is to not just ghost your instagram following, but really reach out, connect and redirect to the new place.
Use alternative search engines like Ecosia
Cancel your amazon prime membership.
If you often buy from amazon, slowly transition yourself out of that narcissistic relationship by looking for the item on its regular company website. Buy directly from the seller.
Private message all your Facebook friends and do the same thing as step 1. Better yet for both of these (suggestions 1 and 5)
Unregister with the democratic or republican party is you are a member. Register with, attend a meeting of, read their website, (something!) with socialist political organizations such as PSL.
Experiment with working 5% less hard at work. Assess. Repeat.
Stop consuming doomscrolling / mainstream news - pour that attention into spaces like substack, a book, your neighborhood, your body, your creativity, your spirituality, your small business.
Follow the people you love hearing from on their other platforms. I have zero doubt that most of the people whose content you consume on instagram can be found elsewhere.
Nap. Holding boundaries in narcissistic relationships takes as fuck ton of energy. It’s a good time to rest. (reminder: instagram, and frankly screens in general, is not rest. it sucks i know. but your reserves will actually be replenished without them. trust. it might feel weird or bad or anxiety inducing at first, but give it a few weeks, ideally a month before you call it.)
Those are my ideas for now. I’m going to keep sitting with this concept and would love your sense of it all.
In solidarity,
Lucky
Recommended reading:
This is a fragile ceasefire. We must ensure it holds.
7 Signs a Narcissist is done with you.
Recommended listening:
Is this the rapture? With Roan Boucher on How To Survive The End of The World podcast
Embodied Astrology Aquarius Season Horoscopes
From the Frontlines: Class Struggle and Class War in the US Southeast on the Upstream podcast
Recommended watching:
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